Hey Time Dorks,

In my last dispatch, I wrote about the power of pausing and how taking a beat can give you more space to choose a thoughtful response.

Today, I want to share a simple body-based tool that makes that pause even more powerful.

Something to Try — The 4-6 Breath

The other afternoon, I was wrapping up my workday when an email from a client arrived with some unfortunate news: they needed to postpone a workshop we had scheduled for later in the week.

Instantly, I was annoyed.

My mind started spinning with all the problems this would cause.

“We’ll need to reschedule… that means juggling logistics… and deciding if I’ll enforce the cancellation policy… what about other client bookings… ughhh.”

As I quickly started typing my response, I recognized something. My chest felt tight. I was clenching my jaw. My heartbeat was beginning to race. And I don’t think I’d taken a breath in the last five minutes.

All signs pointed to one thing: I was triggered.

A few years ago, I would have hammered out a reply and sent it without a second thought. It would have been reactive, emotional, and definitely not my best work.

But these days, I’m much more aware that my state, meaning my mental, emotional, and physical condition at any given moment, has a huge impact on the quality of my thinking and communication.

Maybe you’ve noticed this too.

Sometimes the trigger begins in your mind, like a frustrating email or a tense conversation. Other times it begins in your body, like after a poor night of sleep or when you feel overstimulated.

Regardless of where it starts, your nervous system reacts in a similar way. It starts perceiving a challenge as a threat, your state shifts, and everything feels harder than it needs to be.

That’s because… drumroll please… your brain and body are connected.

If you’ve read Make Time, you know we talk about this in the “Energize” section. And over the past five years, I’ve become a bit obsessed with tracking and shaping my own state.

One of the coolest things I've learned is about how you can influence your state simply through breathing.

Why the breath is such a superpower

Your breath sits within your autonomic nervous system. This part of your body handles the automatic stuff like heart rate, blood pressure, digestion, and breathing.

Most of the time, you breathe without thinking, which is neat, because can you imagine spending all day remembering to breathe?

But unlike your heart rate or blood pressure, you can consciously control your breath. And when you do, you influence your entire nervous system.

The simplest way I’ve learned to think about it:

• Inhale = gas pedal (activates, energizes)
  ​
• Exhale = brake (slows, calms)

This is why the advice “just take a deep breath” is actually grounded in real physiology (although I don’t recommend going around telling people to do this unless you want to annoy the hell out of your friends and family members!).

There’s a reason breathwork is having a moment: modern science is confirming what ancient traditions have known for millennia - your breath is a keystone for how you think and feel.

So let me share one of my favorite go-to patterns:

The 4–6 Breath

It works like this:

1. Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds
2. Exhale (nose or mouth) for 6 seconds

That’s it.

By elongating the exhale, you’re gently pumping the brakes.

Just a few minutes of breathing this way lowers your heart rate, reduces blood pressure, and brings a surprising amount of calm back into your system.

And unlike top-down strategies (like therapy, meditation, or mental reframing), which work through your thoughts, the breath is a bottom-up tool. It works through your body to shift your mind.

That’s why it’s so fast and effective, and I've found it to be one of the simplest ways to shift your state, right in the middle of everyday life.

Back to the email

So there I was, triggered and about to send an impulsive reply.

Instead, I paused.

I took a few rounds of 4–6 Breath.

My body softened. My mind slowed. I felt more present.

And once my nervous system settled, the situation looked totally different. I was able to respond with a calm, creative reply that worked for me and my client.

When you are triggered, your body behaves as if there is a threat. It sends signals that something dangerous is happening. But I was safe. I was not being chased by a tiger, even though my body was acting like I was.

The 4-6 Breath is one way to signal safety to your system. And when your body feels safe, your options expand. You have more choice in how you respond.

It might seem like a tiny thing, but this simple tool gives me a surprising amount of clarity, calm, and peace of mind throughout the day. I find myself using it more and more in all kinds of situations.

You can use it too.

Here are a few moments where it can help you

1) When you finish work and want to be present at home

Before you walk through the door, try a couple minutes of 4–6 Breath. It helps you relax and transition into your evening with more intention.

2) When you are distracted but want to focus

Instead of fighting yourself, pause and practice this pattern. I find about 5 minutes is very effective, but experiment with different lengths and notice if focusing becomes easier.

3) When you feel yourself reacting emotionally

Whether it is an annoying email or a tense conversation, use three cycles of this breath. It gives your thinking mind time to come back online, and the pause becomes more spacious and productive.

Give it a try and let me know what you think!

If you want to go deeper…

This is one of the tools we teach inside The Inner Operating System, our program for driven professionals who want to go from feeling scattered, stressed, or overwhelmed to feeling focused, energized, present, and in control.

If lately you’ve felt yourself:

• Constantly reacting to everything around you, with little control over your time and attention
• Spread too thin, overwhelmed by endless demands
• Mentally foggy or physically drained, no matter how hard you try to push through
• Struggling to switch off, even when you want to rest and be present

And if deep down, you’d love to experience:

• More clarity in how you think, plan, and make decisions
• A steadier mind and more consistent energy throughout the day
• A greater sense of intention and focus, instead of feeling reactive rushed
• Genuine presence with the people you care about

Then this program might be for you.

Applications are now open.

​Just fill out this short survey and we’ll set up time to connect and see if it’s a fit.

Until next time,

Connor

P.S. Here is what a recent participant, Sarah, had to say about her experience in The Inner Operating System: