The joy of being bored – and even being stuck


Hello Time Dorks!

There’s a lot of pressure to start the year with a bang. Get. Stuff. Done. Stay busy. Make resolutions. Arrange plans. In other words: never be bored.

It could be the Busy Bandwagon telling us that anything less than full capacity is a failure. Maybe it’s social media demanding a picture-perfect version of ourselves – always laughing, hiking, dancing, or whatever it is people think is interesting! Or maybe it’s all those Infinity Pools, distracting us from our boredom before we have a chance to feel it.

A CONFESSION

I’ve been getting familiar with boredom’s goopy sister, being stuck.

My wife Claire has come back into the business after maternity leave. It’s a big transition period for us, which means it’s a natural time to reflect. We’re entering a period of uncertainty: what new directions could we take the business? What’s in store for the future?

At the moment, we have a lot of exciting avenues we’d like to explore (watch this space!), but nothing’s totally clicked yet. At the same time, not being able to decide is hard. Uncertainty, much like boredom, is uncomfortable.

LEARNING TO ENJOY IT

Some of us reach for a plan, sometimes even a bad one, just for the comfort of knowing and taking action!

So what if we got comfortable in uncertainty? If – stay with me here – we even learned to enjoy being bored?

It could mean making better decisions.

At the moment, we’re not putting pressure on ourselves to make any big calls. Instead, we’re trying to see this time as one in which we can really explore our options. It’s not just a bore, it’s a luxury. It fills me with confidence that we’ll make the right choice when we feel ready.

Getting comfortable in that has taken some work. Let me share some lessons with you.

1) Start with some reframing

Rather than seeing boredom or being stuck as a problem to solve, try to see it as an opportunity for exploration. When we don’t know where we’re going, it could mean we’re in uncharted territory, which means we could be pushing boundaries.

There’s a quote I love from an interview (link below) with David Whyte, an Irish poet:

“How do you know that you're on your path? Because it disappears. That’s how you know. How do you know that you're really doing something radical? Because you can't see where you are going. That’s how you know.”

2) Explore other areas, too

This is a great time to explore other hobbies and passions. I’ve joined a padel league this year - I’m loving learning a new sport and meeting new people.

Sometimes, a need for change could be satisfied by other areas of your life. Solutions to hard problems also come from unexpected places. Take it from me - lots of life’s big problems are solved on long walks (or on the court)!

3) Practice reflection

Sometimes looking back is the best way to move forward. You don’t have to wait until the start or end of the year to do a review. In fact, this is a perfect time to collect your thoughts on what your next steps could be. Take some notes!

4) Clear your head

Our brains can be a tricky place to be sometimes. I meditate every day, which gives me the headspace to approach these periods with a feeling of calm and clarity.

It also helps me to understand my boredom. For example, what it is I want to change and why.

5) Talk to people

Boredom doesn’t always feel nice, but there’s no shame in it. Talk about it, and you might find other people experiencing the same.

Conversations might sprout new ideas, too. We’re social animals, and part of why we’ve evolved that way is to share important information. Use it to your advantage!

6) Avoid Infinity Pools

Set up barriers to Infinity Pools - they’re shortcuts out of boredom and stamp out reflection and more meaningful thought. Continue to be intentional with the information you’re consuming (social media, the news etc.), and use your energy for what matters to you.

Remember, you could be on the edge of exciting change. Looking back, you might even miss it! We’ve all been so busy that we’ve wished we had the pleasure of being bored again. Tap into that enjoyment.

Until next time,

Connor

P.S. If you’re interested: David Whyte, recorded in 1994

P.P.S. Still thinking about this Airbnb-in-cave

Time Dorks

Join 20,000 curious humans who receive our bi-weekly newsletter filled with tips, experiments, stories all about making time for the projects and people that matter most. // Written by Connor Swenson, with occasional interludes from Make Time Creators Jake Knapp and John Zeratsky.

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